Some people would like to be ambidextrous. I, however, strive to be jawbidextrous. What the hell is jawbidextrous you might ask? I'll tell you. One day I'm sitting at work chewing on some hard candy (Runts) and I notice that I only chew hard things in the right side of my mouth. I switch the Runts over to the left side of my mouth and it feels uncomfortable and with each chew I'm almost worried it will hurt. I decide right then and there I will no longer be a slave to my one-sided chewing. I will become jawbidextrous. I will chew on both sides equally. So today I begin my quest to become jawbidextrous. My plan is to chew hard candy only on the left side of my mouth until it becomes as comfortable as it is to chew hard candy on the right side of my mouth.
I don't remember when I started only chewing hard things on the right side of my mouth, so this may take a while!
2 comments:
Phil, I am glad that you decided to post this blog (although I'm sure you're doing it at work, which is irritating because now you not only have beer but also blogging time at work...) but it gives me the opportunity to get a taste of your weirdness from the comfort of my southern home. I like it. Your thought process never seems to amaze/perplex/entertain me. Bring you wife down here for a visit soon. Peace out, homie
PS. many of my dislikes align with your dislikes. BOOO bosox
Thanks Martha, that's why I love you. I can't wait to bring the wife down to Charlotte to visit you.
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